Martha Stewart : The Apprentice

Long vacation's almost over! Wow, back to work tomorrow! Yes, I love to work because I feel bored at home...

I had a long vacation for the Holy Week and yes, I was a bit bored. All I did was watching TV series on DVD... done with Heroes Season 2, Prison Break Season 3, Desperate Housewives Season 3 and I was running out of DVD except when I looked at my compilation and I saw The Apprentice by Martha Stewart which, I bought last year and didn't tried to watch it. I put on the Martha Stewart DVD on my player and started viewing it. I enjoyed the series and yes Martha Stewart's firm in looking for her Body and Soul Magazine executive... The interview process is really different. And it takes weeks before Martha chose who's the best... It's a one against 15 endeavor of the applicants. It started with 16 teamed up into 2 of 8s. Until 2 applicants were left Martha is to decide who among them fit the job!

Martha's interview process have illustrated very well how team work is important in a group. In the first team up, the team MATCH STICK is totally a mess compared to team PRIMARIUS. There is no unity in the team or let me say there's no team work. They never came up with a good idea because they always fight and they keep on blaming someone who did the big part of the project. They end up hating and backstabbing each members. In the other hand, Team PRIMARIUS discussed things and ideas thoroughly so, they end up with a good ideas. There was an instance when there's a conflict between the 2 members of the PRIMARIUS. The task was to design and bake a wedding cake. The conflict was between the Project Manager and his member. What struck me most in that situation is that they confronted each other after that shouting and saying the Fs and the Bs. And so, everything went well after that.

In my team, I think we lack unity and teamwork. Yes, we are doing everything for the good of the team and of the company as well but our Manager is not authoritative enough to delegate a task. We just sometimes have problems with members of the team (who has light tasks) who delegate their own task to others even if they know how loaded everybody is. And they are not even willing to learn and move one step higher. Some are not open to new challenges and when given a new task which is not familiar, easily freaks out and shout at someone as an outlet.

Yes, I was a victim of one of my Team Leader. Everybody knows how loaded I am and she asked me how to generate a specific report and I told her my other Team Leader knows how to do that. Then she just settled down on her seat and just kept quiet. Hey look, if you're the one in need, I guess it's appropriate that you approach that person because that person's doing something. I remembered what she told me that the port does not approach the ship. It happens the other way around. Yes, she should be the one to approach me. Then comes another day. She was asked by another TL about it and she can't answer... there she freaks out and shouted at me. I just kept my mouth shut and later I found out what gave her the hot temper - it's the new task given to her which I believe she now delegated to a team member close to her. Not mentioning she's not that busy as her members. I could till remember she told what she told me before," OBEY FIRST BEFORE YOU COMPLAIN." Look who's talking! All she loves doing is to talk about who and what the who's doing. I believe I'm one of those whos she talks about but I don't care really. She's just insecure because she talks about me before about promotion thing. I don't really care because I don't need a title to be a leader. What matters to me is I'm doing what I can for my team and my company.

I hope and pray that our Manager is firm enough to delegate a task to who and that who will try his best first before telling the Manager he can't make it and needs help.

Untitled

My day's just fine. But there are few that are unusual to me:

1) I saw a bruise on my wrist but I don't know how did I get it.

2) My friend asked me to gargle with mouth close... (what was she thinking?...hahahaha but I also asked myself what if I try? I will someday hahahaha.)

3) I looked at the sky while I was approaching the gate later this evening... I saw a part of the cloud seem to have a different color. The first time in few years that I've noticed the moon at 1st quarter... been years since I last did star gazing.

Nothing follows... ;)

A Long Traumatic Day

In this world, we have different people with different characteristics and yes, I happened to meet a disaster today---with someone I called my boss, and my friend.

First time in my present workplace (for 3 years) that someone gave me a high-toned voice saying I am selfish..that I don't share my knowledge. How would I teach someone not interested? I mean what's the point? Hello, if you're interested to learn, why don't you approach the one you want to teach you? And to think, the person am referring to is my supervisor.

Sometimes people from higher position don't understand their staffs.... that their staffs are busier than they are. Some are shifting from one attitude to another after the promotion. Whoah! It's really an observation and it really happen.

An SMS from my Sister

"Life's never easy. You can decide for things you need, but you can't expect a good result. You can choose a lifestyle you want, but you can't be sure of contentment. You can enjoy the feeling of loving and being loved, but there is no sure way of happiness. But if we let God be our life's guide, we can be sure of safe landing, real contentment and true happiness."

Just got this message few minutes ago. The message just came right in time. Does my sister know I'm unhappy? Does she know I feel empty? Does she know I haven't been to church for the past Sundays?

Before, she knows I'm fighting in life's battle. She knows how hard I tried to survive. It just fade. Everything turned out to be fine. I became happy and yes, she's happy because I've changed my views in life.

For the past days, I went back to the old me. Someone, who questions life. I don't know. Maybe because I saw someone from my past...someone special but couldn't talk to anymore because I've done something unforgivable maybe.

The past days, I sometimes find myself sobbing in my room. And there's nothing I could do but tell God everything about it and lift them all to Him. I hope I'd be ok soon. Someday...

The 3rd Week of February (18-22)

The whole week seemed to be a bad sign for me. Got lots of encounters from my past and my fears.

Monday, Feb. 18,2008. My company held the annual bowling sportsfest. I saw someone from my past who I never expected to see. Seeing that person would bring me back to depression. Lots of things unresolved. I tried to talk to that person before but I gave up coz it was only me who wanted things to be resolved.

Thursday, Feb. 21 2008, morning. I had a bad dream about my mom. I received a phone call from my dad very early in the morning. It was really something that scared me because I thought one of my fears had just happened (which I've dreamt about).

Thursday, Feb. 21, 2008, evening. Another company's bowling session and I saw that person from my past again.

Things made me feel weak. I don't know what signs they were but I feel weak. I feel bad...

The Early Morning Fear

Since this year started, I have these two fears inside that I really am not certain if I could recover if it happens.

I woke up from my sleep. I stretched my body, reached for my phone to check if I have a message. When I flipped it open, I got a missed call and it was made earlier than 4:30am. It's from my pop. It's a very cold morning. I'm shaking... not because it's cold...but because I'm afraid one of my fears is about to happen. I suddenly sent a message asking why I got a very early missed call from him. He told me to ask my sister about it. The fear I have is growing asking myself why pop can't just tell me about it. After a few minutes, I got a call from his phone...it was ma's voice. I sighed and thanked God they're both ok. They just told me something not related to the fears I'm having.

It's a long story but the fears I have is more of a family related and it's way too long if I will blog about it. Hopefully, someday, I might blog about it...not this time.

Thank God everything's fine...

VALENTINE'S IN THE CITY

February 14, everybody's busy for the so called "heart's day." Families and couples went out for dinner, flowers sent to love ones, friends meet for a chat over coffee, yes, am one of them :).

I was supposed to meet my special friends because we hardly see each other since they left work for nursing school. But again, because student life is busier than having a career life, the date was canceled so, I have to make a plan B.

My friends from the office invited me out for a "not planned gimmick." We went out for dinner and look for a coffee bar. We ended up at a coffee sgop. Cared for a coffee? Yes! The place is nice because it's not crowded. We stayed there and had a long talk. I missed talking to these guys and I was really glad I had bond with them since the last.

My valentine's day wasn't bad at all. I missed my special friends so much but Saturday can wait. I'm meeting them for a post Valentine's Day date.

BF? Someone's asking me...hahahaha.... These days, women no longer allow to have a bf for the sake of just having a bf. So, I'm still in a sort of enjoying my life while I'm still free.... and wait for the person with whom I can share the true feeling they called "LOVE." :)

Amidst an Emotion

Emotion is a strong feeling over something or someone. It could be a happy feeling, it could be a sad feeling, it could be an anger and all that belongs to the feeling family. Emotions can be controlled. It can also be unexpressed. People should be emotionally healthy because sometimes it rules life...it ruins life if its excessively overflowing.

Just this week after workout, while I was at the locker room, I've heard the gym staffs talking about their co-staff who committed suicide(I was wondering who that staff was). Because I was a bit curious why it happened and who that staff was, I joined them in their conversation and they showed me a pitcure of the lady. And then, I remembered her. I kept asking things as if I'm a member of CIA. I've learned she killed herself because she's so depressed. She has two kids and her husband is so irresponsible. Her husband is jobless. Everytime she goes home she can't relax or even rest because she have to cook for the family and do household chores. I don't know how long has she been hiding her emotions. I asked her co-staffs if she's mentioned how worst the situation is. They couldn't believe their friend would just kill herself. None of her co- staffs knew what really happened. The news just came out.

It is really important for us to know until where can we stand amidst the emotions we have over a situation. What happened to that gym staff is that maybe she could no longer control her emotions together with her pessimistic views that she could no longer have a better life.

According to my favorite motivational authors, Stephen Covey, life is a matter of choice and not of destiny. And I believe in that. Few years back, I never gave importance to the chances I have. But I have realized that if I don't do something for myself I couldn't help others. In our life, we need an outlet for everything. I need my family and my friends, to whom I could tell everything I wanted to share. If I have problems, I don't need advices, rather, I just need an ear to listen to me to lighten my heavy heart. I need the Father the most because I could tell Him everything even in silence.

A DESCRIPTION OF AN AQUARIAN

Aquarians are those born under the Aquarius sign. According to the site Astrology-Online, Aquarians basically possess strong and attractive personalities. They fall into two principle types: one shy, sensitive, gentle and patient; the other exuberant, lively and exhibitionist, sometimes hiding the considerable depths of their character under a cloak of frivolity. Both types are strong willed and forceful in their different ways and have strong convictions, though as they seek truth above all things, they are usually honest enough to change their opinions, however firmly held, if evidence comes to light which persuades them that they have been mistaken. They have a breadth of vision that brings diverse factors into a whole, and can see both sides of an argument without shilly-shallying as to which side to take. Consequently they are unprejudiced and tolerant of other points of view. This is because they can see the validity of the argument, even if they do not accept it themselves. They obey the Quaker exhortation to "Be open to truth, from whatever source it comes," and are prepared to learn from everyone.

Both types are humane, frank, serious minded, genial, refined, sometimes ethereal, and idealistic, though this last quality is tempered with a sensible practicality. They are quick, active and persevering without being self-assertive, and express themselves with reason, moderation and sometimes, a dry humor.

They are nearly always intelligent, concise, clear and logical. Many are strongly imaginative and psychically intuitive, so that the Age of Aquarius, which is about to begin, is much anticipated by psychic circles as an age in which mankind will experience a great spiritual awakening. The Aquarian philosophical and spiritual bent may be dangerous in that it can drive the subjects into an ivory-tower existence where they meditate on abstractions that bear little relevance to life. On the other hand it can help the many who have scientific leanings to combine these with the Aquarian yearning for the universal recognition of the brotherhood of man, and to embark on scientific research to fulfill their philanthropic ideals of benefiting mankind. When some cause or work of this nature inspires them, they are capable of such devotion to it that they may drive themselves to the point of exhaustion and even risk injuring their health.

Both types need to retire from the world at times and to become temporary loners. They appreciate opportunities for meditation or, if they are religious, of retreats. Even in company they are fiercely independent, refusing to follow the crowd. They dislike interference by others, however helpfully intended, and will accept it only on their own terms. Normally they have good taste in drama, music and art, and are also gifted in the arts, especially drama.

In spite of the often intensely magnetic, forthcoming and open personality of the more extrovert kind of Aquarian, and of their desire to help humanity, neither type makes friends easily. They sometimes appear to condescend to others and take too little trouble to cultivate the acquaintance of people who do not particularly appeal to them. They do not give themselves easily - perhaps their judgment of human nature is too good for that - and are sometimes accounted cold. But once they decide that someone is worthy of their friendship or love, they can exert an almost hypnotic and irresistible mental attraction on them and will themselves become tenacious friends or lovers, ready to sacrifice everything for their partners and be faithful to them for life. However, they are sometimes disappointed emotionally because their own high personal ideals cause them to demand more of others than is reasonable. And if they are deceived their anger is terrible. If disillusioned, they do not forgive.

Aquarians work best in group projects, provided that they are recognized as having a leading part in them. They have a feeling of unity with nature and a desire for knowledge and truth that makes them admirable scientists, especially astronomers and natural historians. They may excel in photography, radiography, electronics - anything connected with the electrical and radio industries - aviation and everything technical. On the arts and humanities side their progressive tendencies can be expressed in writing, especially poetry, and broadcasting, or as welfare workers and teachers. Some have gifts as entertainers and make good character actors (having an ability to mimic) and musicians. The more psychic among them possess healing gifts, especially in curing the mentally sick.

Among the faults to which they are liable are fanatical eccentricity, wayward egotism, excessive detachment and an inclination to retreat from life and society, and a tendency to be extremely dogmatic in their opinions. Aquarians can be a threat to all they survey or a great boon for humanity in general. Circumstances - for example, continuous opposition to a cause they hold dear - may cause the atrophy of the openness of mind that is one of the Aquarian's most attractive traits. They may express a lack of integrity in broken promises, secretiveness or cunning. Simmering anger and resentment, rudeness or, worse, a tense, threatening silence which may suddenly burst out in eruptions of extreme temper, these are all part of the negative side of the Aquarian. This can also reveal itself in a sustained hatred for enemies that is capable of enlarging itself into a misanthropy toward the whole of mankind.

LIKES

• Fighting for Causes
• Dreaming and Planning for the Future
• Thinking of the Past
• Good Companions
• Having Fun

DISLIKES
• Full of Air Promises
• Excessive Loneliness
• The Ordinary
• Imitation
  
• Idealistic
  

PROBLEMS THAT MAY ARISE TO YOU, AND THEIR SOLUTIONS

As with all sun signs, we all have unique traits to our personalities. When these traits are suppressed, or unrealized, problems will arise. However, with astrology we can examine the problem and assess the proper solution based on the sun sign characteristics. As an Aquarius you may see things below that really strike home. Try the solution, you most likely will be amazed at the results. If you find yourself on the receiving end of the negatives below, it is because you are failing to express the positive.

Problem: Being left all alone while others enjoy the companionship you long for.
Solution: You should practice expressing your humanity by accepting people the way they are and not find too much fault in them.

Problem: You always seem to miss the boat when it comes to love.
Solution: Try letting down the mental guard that you keep on your emotions that stops you from being the self you long to be.

Problem: You always seem to miss out on the better jobs or big promotions at work.
Solution: Learn to use your positive side in teamwork and group effort, the lone wolf approach will get you nowhere.

Problem: You seem to become physically ill more than you should.
Solution: By repressing your emotions you drive the unrest deep inside where it can cost you in terms of health. Express your feelings but do it with tact.